Beep. Beep. Beep.

Hospital beeps chimed. The thumping of her heart pumped the beats of the sounds. Face flushed, palms sweating, Riley swung her legs as they tapped the chair ominously. She was unscathed, cruelly enough.

Hannah wasn't, however.

It was the bags. They needed their space. Why? Riley clutched at her forehead. She hated the setting as she hated the sounds. Get me away from here.

Despite her pleads, they did her no good. Her butt was implanted into the hard cushion, legs refusing to be of more use then existing. She squirmed around, comfort escaping. At least she was back into here own clothes, she decided. They had to take her back into the rooms and check her over, despite her protests. She was fine. They had simply confirmed what she had known to be true.

The hospital revolving doors swung round. From her position, close towards the desk in case news had been brought, and close towards the exit if space be needed, she could see the figures of an entire happy family. They brought home joy in a bundle.

She continued to stare at the door. It swung around as a worried face entered. With quick, rushed paces, the figure stepped in. Though she could barely see the stranger’s face, his emotions reflected that of her own. But it was the emergency room. Everybody's emotions reflected just that—at minimum that intensity.

“Gah,” Riley released from her breaths. She wanted something. Bad enough was it that no news had arrived. Only the memories were left to taunt, left to see what she could not see with her eyes blinded by fear. Her eyes slipped closed.

Her head rolled back into the seat, trying to avoid the crashing glass. Crimson red started pooling as though a movie were playing. A scream was muffled, chiming louder than anything else.

A groan shuttered from her insides as the memory prickled.

“Moaning there?” a hoarse, cocky voice sounded. “I didn’t know I still did that to you.”

That voice, Riley’s mind registered. It was a male. She knew this voice. The way that tone struck through, the accent that could not be placed…

Sighing, her eyes opened as she felt eyes on her. Her eyes snapped into the light, adjusted, and there the voice’s owner appeared.

Glimmering green orbs looked back.

Crud. It was him.

Of all the inopportune moments in the world, it was this he chose.

“What the hell?” she asked. Her head throbbed, though not from the accident. She rubbed her temples, closing her eyes again. She hadn’t allowed her eyes to stray on his face long. She knew it too well. She knew his ice-breaker was always along those lines. She knew him too well.

Riley heard the intake of his breath. Was my comment too sharp? My bad. Her thoughts bit sarcastically at him, as her tongue stayed back.

“Huh,” he started breathing. “Hih-ngh-ah.”

Barely audible was it, yet she had heard.

“Bless you,” she sighed in return, eyes still closed. If anything, it couldn’t hurt to be polite. It became her new mantra.

He sniffed once, she listened. Her senses were sharp razor blades—catching everything about him.

“Thanks,” he sniffed. The polite guy was pulled. Nice. In reply, she gave a quick mhmm. She was done with pleasantries. She wanted answers, damn it. She wanted to know what was happening. Gah.

“You look stressed,” he commented. She felt the couch, seat, whatever she was sitting on creek as he placed himself down next to her. His close presence did not lessen the pounding of her heart as it used to. Did it use to? Or did it use to send her heart flying?

“Hanging in there?”

She gave no response. How the hell could he remain so calm? It didn’t add up.

Sure, he knew the basics. Everyone had to have heard something about those poor women in that little crash. Did he even know? Did he have to suffer seeing the blood pool from her childhood best friend? Did he?

Her silence marked her answer. No, she wasn’t ‘hanging in there’.

“That’d be a no,” he trailed, without the right words to place into his mouth next. He wanted her voice again so he wouldn’t be the one caught. Why was he always the one that was caught?

An exasperated sigh from Riley was the response he got. She parted her lips and began to speak.

“Do you even know what happened?” Well, he obviously did. That was certain, or else he would not be in the same place as her. He hadn’t been in the same room as her for ages—and the hospital didn’t seem the most heartwarming reunion setting.

He had been quite the romantic, from what her memories spoke. Then again, it could’ve been her imagination filling in for her memory, altering the history to the way she wanted it.

“Riley.”

He said my name.

Her breaths were quicker now, a steady crescendo of volume and rhythm. He said her name. He never said her name. She had always been his… Her mind could not fathom it, as she listened for the continuance of his line.

“… and you know that. Are you even listening?”

Whoa. She had missed a great portion of the words he spoke, and she had to strain her eyes and train them to listen in and hear the words that he was saying.

He finished, “you have that same look on your face. You had it before. That was when you were thinking.”

Her mind spun. Were they even talking about the same thing? He had been known to ramble though. Disregarding the last minute’s ramble, she carried on her own thought, exasperated, and anxious to hell.

“Can you go in there?” Riley asked suddenly. He was family.

She wasn’t… legally, at least. And thus, she was not allowed in the operating room that she longed to be inside, so that she could at least have the slightest idea of what was going on inside. It was insider information—and clearly, she was the outcast.

“Hngh-ih-huh-hnxgh-uh,” he stifled into his shoulder. She had noticed far too much about him. Again.

“Bless you,” she chimed, without so much a care for his health. As of the moment, she wanted answers.

“Excuse me,” he started.

It seemed his new mantra was ‘always the gentleman’. She gave a quick smile, as an answer. Sure, it was fake and plastered. But it was a smile nonetheless.

“Yes?” She wanted her answer, damn it.

“I can’t go in there,” he said, hesitant. She could picture the way his face would look, as her eyes were still closed. Making an effort from her tired, sluggish manners, she lifted the eyelids and stared to her right, seeing the familiar face.

Health was the first thing she looked for. His face, it was supposed to be fresh and young. Instead, heavy under-eye circles found their way onto the sickly pale skin, the emergency room’s lights doing wonders.

A pain ached as she saw the green orbs close, Riley’s own eyes continuing to dance across his face. She noted the cute freckles that danced across his skin, deliciously flushed with rose.

Stop that, she chided at her mind.

“Why can’t you go into there? Of course you can go into there. You are family, and according to law, I’m not. This means that only you can go in there. And I can’t. Which sucks, and gahh,” she trailed off. Looking at him was too painful, so she closed her eyes again.

Maybe if she didn’t see she didn’t have to feel either.

A warm hand grabbed hers, a fluid, jerky motion. She debated slapping it away. She felt a sense of being resigned fall over her as he began to rub smooth circles onto her hand, trying to rub away the stress. He squeezed her hand once.

“Can you please just go into there? Just tell me how she is. I need someone to,” Riley mumbled, a bare sound in the screeching silence.

“I can’t,” he stressed. The pain—it would kill him. “Please, just calm down, please.”

Riley gave another sigh. It seemed to happen a lot lately, her sighs perpetual and everlasting. She wanted answers. She didn’t want calm. She wanted Hannah.

“Will you even try to see her?”

His eyes closed. A breath fanned over, as he let it out slowly, a short response. “No.”

She nodded, temporarily accepting his answer.

“Then how the hell can you stay so calm, Alexander Parker. Tell me how the hell you can be so calm there, when that’s your cousin, dying.”

ANOTHER AMAZING PIECE OF ART.
I love you. :]

wow

Oh, you're a beautiful writer! The presentation of your characters was divine. And the sneezes were great too. 8D

Whoa!
Amazing!!!!!

Your writing is wonderful!
Really touched my heart, I felt everything the character did.
Don't know if you're planning on continuing this, but if you are, I can't wait to read it!

There wasn’t much that he could say to respond to that.

She realized this, but wanted someone to blame—so she blamed him for the silence that followed and for not having words to fill them.

So tempting was it to ask, no response? Hm? However, Riley knew better then that. It wasn’t the right time, it wasn’t the right place, and hell, it was the holidays. Time beckoned and groveled on its knees to ask of Riley to beat down the grudge, and be kind to… it.

Did I just call him an “it”?

Closing her eyes, a melodic voice that was her own rang a few soft chuckles from her failure, like a mist pounding onto the grass.

“What’s so funny?” Alexander wondered. Funny was it that her thoughts didn’t register him as Alex. They used to automatically call him that—even though he preferred Zander. Alexander let Riley too. He loved her enough to handle her nomenclature.

Now, she would be firm on her thoughts, and grasp at the things she wanted. He would be Alexander until the day all hell froze over.

But they weren’t counting days—they were counting minutes, counting seconds, hoping Hannah would hold on.

She had to hold on.

“What?” she snapped, back in reality. Muffled were her thoughts, kept so quiet.

He sighed. “Nothing.”

Resignation that lay in their relationship muddied the waters. Resignation was maturity. Maturity was the icebreaker, and the ice had maintained shape. And being cryptic, it was the package of normality.

Then again, things were different now, weren’t they?

She sighed. “No really, what was that?” Tolerance had disappeared.

“It doesn’t matter,” he retorted.

“Just tell me already,” she huffed, exasperated. “Why the hell are you so freaking stubborn?”

His body language became defensive—arms crossed, shoulders tense, eyes narrowing.

“I’m sorry, was it my fault that you couldn’t listen to a damn word I said?” The volume of their voices experienced a crescendo.

“Well, excuse me for being worried about my best friend!” she screamed. Her fingers ran through her hair as she took breaths, calming herself down. She felt dampness reach towards her eyes.

Screams of the people nearby sounded. Chaos and sirens sounded. The deafening wails from the sirens grew louder until blacking out—unable to help her out first.

She felt his presence as he moved. Awkwardly, she felt his arms wrap around, pulling her body tightly towards his.

For a few moments, they sat like that, unmoving.

Quickly, he turned his head aside. The motion was far from fluent and spontaneous, as she turned her head to look.

“Hih-huh–” he breathed. His back was turned towards her. “Hi’nxGHt. Huh-tch-nn.”

As always, she noticed too much. She felt the stiffening of his body as he tried desperately to stifle, and the slight sniffles that followed pierced her hearing. She tried to focus on the other sounds in the lobby, except nothing but him sounded.

“Bless you,” she mumbled into his chest, as they both leaned over the arm rest awkwardly. He sniffed once and turned back, head resting on her shoulder.

“Thanks,” he sighed. The slight touch of his breath on her skin left shivers. The screaming, the fighting, the pure frustration—it had always left them exhausted.

She slowly felt her heart rate return to a healthy pace, one that she hoped would brace others in the emergency room.

“I want her okay,” Riley mumbled. His grip on her body grew tighter as he used her as a teddy bear.

“Me too,” Alexander started. “I do too.”

Another silence followed, until broken by a few unhealthy, dry sounding coughs. They hurdled at him, as he eventually pulled away, doubling over.

He eventually stopped, with moisture residing in his green eyes, cheeks flushed rose.

“You okay?” Riley asked. He gave a nod, still evening his breaths.

They were no longer connected, physically, at least. And while it was back to a safety zone, she knew nothing had actually changed. Sure, they had spoken, they had been civil.

But nothing would change.

Somewhere in the next silence, her foot began tapping anxiously. His fingers began drumming on the wooden armrest.

Listening, her ears were open to the sounds of heart monitors, though faint. The swinging and closing of a door sounded. The few short screeches of a siren engulfed the room. A phone rang, quickly answered.

“Alexander,” she started. The word was foreign slipping off her tongue. It had been missing from her vocabulary for quite some time. “Can you please, just visit her for me?”

Instead of receiving an answer, she heard his breaths hitch again.

“Hi’nGh-tch.” He sniffed. “Excuse me,” he continued, a light cough heard in his voice.

Again, she chimed, “Bless you.”

He mumbled a quick 'thank you' before turning his body towards her, cheeks flushed beautifully. She stared in vicinity to his face, but looking at the real thing she found too difficult.

“What was that you were saying?”

“Um…” she hesitated, knowing he would say no—knowing, but unwilling to accept. He wasn’t going to see Hannah. If you know, why do you bother asking him?

‘Spit it out, will you?’ he could have asked. Perhaps he would have, had they been two different people at a different time and place. Instead, his words were softer.

“Tell me, please,” he urged. While Alexander didn’t exactly use her name, and she still had murderous thoughts towards him, they were getting along. Better, at the very least.

She contemplated. He had asked, and she did have reason to beg him to see Hannah. He had initiated the question, not her, but her roundabout explanation still flooded a bit of guilt into her heart.

“Ri-ri, please?” He proceeded to give a smile, one that he had reserved after the years to flash in this moment, using the nickname he used for years to beg her with.

It wasn’t fair.

Sighing, Riley capitulated. “Just see Hannah. Please, just see her and tell me how she is.” Allowing her eyes to close, she sighed and listened to her whining voice. She listened to her selfish voice.

He gave a loud sigh, the exhale long and pronounced. “I can’t,” he sighed again, dragging the ‘a’ sound in can’t. The sigh soon turned into reverse affect, breaths hitching.

“Heh-ngH-uh.” He sniffled, the liquid sounds filling the air, as she heard a few coughs muffled into the crook of his elbow. He snuffled and looked back at her.

Though the fact he was unwell himself was distinctly obvious, she felt the child in her snap, as she knew he very well could march into the room as her direct relative and one of her closest friends. She knew very well he could get his ass into that room.

But she didn’t force him, because it wasn’t what they did anymore, and it never really was to begin with.

“Bless you,” she commented, off handedly. He gave a smile as his thanks, a small nod to accompany.

"H'nxgh," he snapped quickly. They mumbled their usual reactions before turning towards silence.

Refusing to look at him any longer, hating the increase of her heartbeats, she looked anywhere but him. The windows were excitement. Revolving doors were natural beauties. Silence was her friend.

“Are you mad at me?” Alexander’s voice seemed insecure, and Riley hated that. However, the power she felt she loved. She created her own impasse.

Should she answer? She didn’t know. Riley waited and could easily hear the clock’s ticking from nearby. She was sure he heard it as well.

“You are mad at me,” he finalized. “So thanks. Thanks a lot for asking me and for ignoring me. That’s really low Riley, even for you.”

Her throat felt choked, from the air leaving her lungs. She could have gasped and filled them with air, but the dry choking feeling was better than the fully conscious one.

By the time she had started her breathing pattern once more and had looked back at him, his elbows were upright on his armrest, his hands cupping his head. A heavy tension flooded him and the maturity of their ages flashed.

“Why?” became the first word her mind spoke. “It seems like you don’t give a shit about Hannah and her whereabouts. She’s in there dying, and here you are, the only one of us able to do some damn thing to find out what’s happening!”

Her voice had returned to screaming, and it seemed as Alexander often encouraged her vocal chords to work on the projection thing.

“You think I don’t care about my cousin? You think I don’t care about the person who’s like my sister, but even closer? Well then you’re deluded Riley. You’ve lost it if you think I don’t care. But it’d kill me to go in there.” His head had lifted slightly so that the words could be heard, but his head dropped once more to hide from the world.

“Alexander, look at me,” she cooed. Her voice was alluring, daring him to look.

Oh, she breathed when he finally did lift his head to give her a quick glance. The eyes were so sad, the black circles so prominent.

His entire demeanor so resigned.

And then something clicked.

“You don’t think she’s going to live, do you?” Riley asked.

He shook his head. “You were there. You saw the accident, and hell, you were in the accident.”

“Alex, you really think she’s dying?”

He took a moment to think.

“You called me Alex. You only do that when the world is ending.” He took a breath before continuing. She waited and wondered why that had happened—and more so, she waited for some sense of his words.

“So yes, she is dying. She’s not going to make it.”

I'm speechless.
That was awesome!

this is such an amazing story!!!!
please continue!!

“Stop being so goddamn pessimistic,” Riley quoted. Years and years ago, Hannah had pronounced the same line to Alexander.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he bit back. He gave her a little shove, as she lightly tapped the arm rest on the other side.

“Now you hit women too? Gosh, I never knew this was a part of you. Is there something you’re not telling me?” She gave a little wink before smiling to herself, turning away, and pretending to ignore him. He too smiled, and turned away. He gave a few quick coughs, and then looked back up, head turned towards her direction.

And things were different, once more between the too.

All the while, Hannah’s surgery was at its climatic moment. They had attempted to stop the bleeding, and though that was quick, the rest of the notion took much time. A part of her brain had been destroyed permanently.

The doctors were working with no time. And as every moment slipped, so did Hannah.

But Hannah’s spirit grew stronger. Her presence existed everywhere. In Riley and Alexander, she smiled having some premonition of the future the way Hannah always had.

Meanwhile, Riley and Alexander sat. An odd moment of flirting, filled with rainbows and that pretty stuff in life, had passed.

Now they sat wondering what to do.

Feeling like a child bouncing in their seat, waiting desperately for their destination to appear, Riley swung her legs. The exhaustion had settled a little while back, and she wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. Do I stay awake? Or do I fall asleep?

What she wanted most was the man next to her to visit Hannah.

She soon felt as though that wasn’t a possibility though, as she watched his health deteriorate carefully. The slightest of all germs would spread like a wildfire, blazing through whatever its greedy hands could capture.

“H’ntCH-uh.”

“Bless you,” Riley mumbled. When faced with silence, she turned and watched him snap once more, head still down in his lap.

“HnGH. Hi’GH-tch. H’tch-nGH.”

He sniffed deeply, before rubbing at his nose with his finger.

“Thagnks,” he replied. Once more, Alexander sniffed, traces of congestion easing off as he coughed again.

Sounds had started escaping from his attempts at hiding an oncoming illness. It wasn’t easy, she knew, from experience. But she wouldn’t get sick, and if she did, her immune system of ill would kill the cold in 12 hours, flat.

However, Alexander had been prone to the illnesses every month, at minimum. She sighed wondering how Hannah would ever survive with an immune system like Alexander’s. They were family, after all.

“Hey, Alexander?” she asked. The name was becoming warmer on her tongue.

“The answer’s no Riley,” he retorted, sure to say her name in that teasing tone she loved. Somehow, it irked her to the point of slapping that smirk off his face, yet she wouldn’t do that.

“Can we go see her?” Riley persisted. The head-strong girl wouldn’t take anything standing until she was able to see her best friend. It wouldn’t be the last time, she promised herself. Hannah was someone that would live forever. She couldn’t die.

“Damn you. Damn you to hell,” he groaned, followed by a sharp inhalation.

“Hih-h’nGH-uh.”

“Can we?” she asked once more, after they exchanged their usual pleasantries.

Huffing out a sigh, he stood up and sniffed once. “I can’t go in there,” he mumbled. “But you’re my fiancée, aren’t you? You can get in if you’re family.”

She hissed, but was thankful that at the very least, he was taking initiative. “You can’t do that. Isn’t faking a marriage illegal?”

“They won’t mind, or ask. Come on,” he mumbled, before grabbing her forearm and helping her up.

She gave him a quick smile before looking at her feet as they shuffled their way. Slowly the two began to fall into a pace that both could follow, the steady tempo of their feet hammering the marble floor.

He was quickly allowed to pass, and Riley couldn’t help but be slightly envious of his ability to flash an ID and be allowed through. She for one had been stuck begging without luck.

Still, even with this new permission, they weren’t allowed to actually see her.

In some odd way, she knew that as they traveled it would be the last journey they had towards her. They made it past somehow as her trance brought her feet to move.

Not even the glaring beeps, the flashing lights, and the screams of, ‘get her stable’ could break her free. It took Alexander, ironically enough.

“What the hell?” he whispered, pressing his head against the heavy glass of her room. Though you could barely see inside, the curtain had been lifted to allow the doctors in.

“Huh’nGH.”

He snapped around the waist, sneeze following the same hushed tone as his whisper.

“What is it?” Riley pondered. She suddenly was feeling a little bit dizzy and unsure of what she was doing here.

No answer was heard. The beeping started to slow, as a scream ignited. Hannah had no visitors, only the medics inside, the surgeon, the nurse, and those who did not know her.

One nurse took notice, and blessed Riley and Alexander one last chance with her. The doors were opened, as she ushered them into sanitary clothing, covering their mouths to prevent disease.

The nurse fitted Riley first, without saying too many words. She worked quickly and diligently, mainly from the hope that they could see their beloved before she would pass.

There wasn’t much they could do for her, the nurse rebated.

While this happened, Alexander stood by, sniffling. Riley turned and looked towards the sniveling man, as he muffled a few chesty coughs into his jacket. He shivered once, face flushed, as the nurse glanced over. She knew his internal debate to be whether to go in or not.

But by the way things stood, she wanted him to see Hannah. They both knew it would very well be the last time, and a few germs would do nothing.

“HnGH’tch. HnG’shew-uh.”

“Bless you,” Riley sighed. “Dear,” she tacked a little smirk embedded into her face.

“Thanks,” he sniffed, watery eyes squinting and cheeks flushed. The last one had slipped from the grips of his control. “We going to get this show on the road or what?”

They entered knowing fully well there wasn’t much else they could do but watch her wither.

And so they cherished and loved every last moment they spent with her, and they enjoyed every last motion she made. In this time, before her death, she grew more alive.

She talked to them as though she were fine. It was odd the way her mind worked, and while it wasn’t sharp as usual, it was witty. It was still the same Hannah.

And as always, before the time of death, it was her longest time awake and time most alive.

The two watched her fade into death and into a new birth.

Hannah’s last words would be I love you, as they always were.

On a brighter note, happy 975 posts. Thanks for the love. :DDD

Wow, it's great - you have a beautiful style. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. Great job and thanks for sharing!!!

AW! I loved this!
It was amazing, and strangely not that sad, as it didn't give the feeling of totally loosing someone
Thank you!

AWWW.
this is just the right combination of sadness and happiness.
thank you so much for writing this!

Gorgeous.