Dawnie

Dear Jerk returns!

3,899 posts in this topic

Dear Ms. Immaturity.

I'll grow up when I damn well feel like it, and not because you say I should. If I annoy you so much, bugger off and don't talk to me. And certainly don't leave stupid, humourless, and insulting comments on my Facebook statusses. Also, don't you dare assume you know what people around me are thinking. Nobody thinks the same as you, because they know that I can be serious when I need to be.

You've never met me in person, you've not spoken to me properly in almost 2 years, so what on Earth makes you think you have the right to tell me how to live my life? I'm as mature as I want to be, and I'm not going to change for you. You need to grow a sense of humour and learn that people in life are different than your expectations of them.

You do NOT know everything.

The Dead One

Edited by The Dead One

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Dear Cart-Wielding Morons,

As if it isn't bad enough that the modern supermarket isn't big enough for the modern buggy, now you idiots feel the need to grab one even when a basket would suffice?!

You fumble to grab one. You pause as you enter the store, blocking other shoppers. You abandon it in front of others to grab something within "wheeling distance". You let your children hang off of any available side, as they flail and hit merchandise and patrons, and you don't even notice. You stop to chat with Betty, who you see daily at the schoolyard anyhow, and block the main aisle. You grab 4 items, all in the "child seat" of the cart, and then wait in line, taking up more space than necessary.

2 of you cannot pass each other in an aisle because your combined stupidity exceeds the allotted space requirements. Now, nobody else can get through, and you're both painfully oblivious as you stand and gape at macaroni and cheese.

You walk in slow-motion, pushing the most obnoxious, squeaky buggy in the whole damned store, right in the middle of the goddamn aisle so that NOBODY can pass you, and then you stop. We assume you've found what you've been carefully searching for, so we wait patiently behind you, not wanting to break your obviously fragile concentration. And then, we're on the move again -- WAIT! What's this? A 3-point, 5-point, 7-point, 9-POINT turn because you MISSED what you wanted and now you need to turn around but are too inept to BACK THE FUCK UP or DRIVE STRAIGHT THROUGH to turn around and try again??!?!?!!

One day I will go postal in the grocery store. This is a warning.

Sincerely,

The Way-More-Than-Disgruntled Fellow Shopper Who Just Needs Peanut Butter (a 5-minute trip, tops) And Has Been Standing In Line With You And Others Like You For 15 Minutes. In The Express Lane.

(Seriously, one time I lost it so badly in a grocery store that we ducked down one of the pharmacy aisles, and I made C grab a bunch of the reusable bags they sell. We stuffed our entire cart's capacity into these tiny bags, then told the cashier that we didn't want the bags themselves. Grocery shopping makes my blood pressure riiiiiiiiise.)

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^^^ oh man I HATE when they grab the squeaky-wheeled carts. You know those fucking bastards and bitches do it on purpose. It's just their pathetic way of getting attention. They love when people stare at them.

:P

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Dear Cart-Wielding Morons,

Prodigy, that is SOOO worldwide.

You go, girl!!! :dribble:

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Personally, I am immensely grateful to have a thread like this on both forums. I have never once used it to bitch about anyone on the forum, and it has never occurred to me to do so. This is one of the only places where I can vent without feeling that I am trying to get sympathy. It requires no response, and I do not want one, and this is a great place just to be able to yell at the world for a while. If people feel the need to bitch about people who might read it, then I just think that is petty and a bit cowardly. But I don't think that it is a reason to take the thread away. It's really useful to me, at least. And everyone reading my posts can always rest assured that they never refer to anyone on the forum.

Dear Dental/Facial Issues,

Just sort yourselves out, ok? I'm bored of this crap. Just chill out and come down.

Your Host.

Dear Antibiotics,

WORK. Work NOW. Work BETTER.

Your patient.

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Good to see you here Kastrel! :laugh:

Hope you feel better soon.

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You go, girl!!! :P

There's something vaguely disturbing about a middle-aged white man saying "You go, girl!!!".....

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You go, girl!!! :cheers:

There's something vaguely disturbing about a middle-aged white man saying "You go, girl!!!".....

Then if you want to be vaguely disturbed, go ahead. I won't stop you.

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Dear Jerk,

You're so vaain, you probably think this song is aboout you, you're so vaaaain /end singing (If you can see this I'm not talking to you below. Not to mention, I always wonder why people who see themselves in all the dear jerk letters bother to click on the thread in the first place. Isn't it just a way of inviting yourself to feel offended/feel hurt/see conspiracies? Shoo.)

Stalker, much? :) There are actually lives for sale or rent. You should seriously try it out. Isn't there a point somewhere where you get tired of looking like a frothing, vicious idiot? It kind of kills your "I HATE YOU AND AM SOOO ABOVE YOU" deal when you follow people around constantly, especially people who forgot you were alive until you stomped up to tell them how unimportant they were to you. Crossed a huge parking lot to stomp up and tell them you don't want to talk to them. Is there something actually mentally wrong with you, that you think it's impressive to come bother people who are ignoring you - not pointedly ignoring you, not doing ANYTHING to you except not caring what you do and letting you live and let live - to tell them how unimportant they are to you? Apparently not, since none of us even knew you were there, and you knew way too much about what one of us was doing. And didn't know what I'd been doing, and had an active imagination about what it must've been. What I have been doing has definitely given me the perspective to be amused rather than bothered by you, but then, I'm not the one you're really stalking, am I? And that's where it stops being funny, and starts driving my bloodpressure right up.

Your little crush has passed annoying into downright creepy. Please go stalk someone else. If you ever lay so much as a fingertip on me again I swear to god I'm going to get myself arrested. If you ever lay a fingertip on her again, you will regret I was ever born, I PROMISE you.

Ta.

Ahh, taste the sweet venting release. ;]

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You're so vaain, you probably think this song is aboout you, you're so vaaaain /end singing (If you can see this I'm not talking to you below. Not to mention, I always wonder why people who see themselves in all the dear jerk letters bother to click on the thread in the first place. Isn't it just a way of inviting yourself to feel offended/feel hurt/see conspiracies? Shoo.)

The first part made me laugh- because honestly that is what I tell myself when I get paranoid. I'm Such a doof sometimes. And for me it really isn't *all* of them... just some. To be honest- I think that it is when I see myself in the "jerk" I get like that... which really *isn't* about what the other person wrote- it's about me needing to figure out how to deal with whatever that issue is.

Dear People at Church,

UGH!!!!!!!!! When I say that I *can't* be on a committee- I *Can't*. Yes- I know that *everyone* is stressed and that "it is *only* once a month, but... when the once a month is not only draining my soul but next fall I'm going to be running around like a headless chicken....

Plus it *isn't* Just once a month when you mysteriously add onto it.

Maybe I'm selfish, maybe I'm horrid. But... all the nonsense... I want to either just worship alone in the woods away from people *Or* mysteriously not show up one week- and just start going somewhere else and just worship and no political CRAP!

Tired of trying to be "nice" and "responsible"

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tma - I was being silly, not nasty there. :] I totally DO get it. Everyone I've ever talked to has said they get that defensive back-up feeling from this kind of thing sometimes. But there's a huge difference between having it bug you and reading it anyway and seeing it as a huge steaming cesspit of passive-aggressive attacks on youyouyou and *reading it anyway.* O.o

It's posts in text on an internet board, generally by people who have lives. Wondering is one thing - I think we all do it. Reading it when it's damaging your mental or emotional well-being is a whole different thing, you know?

And I know no one here was being that melodramatic, and you absolutely weren't! It's just how far this kind of thing can go sometimes. People slipping PMs whispering "that post about her uncle's wife's dog was really about YOU" trying to stir shit up - that kind of stuff is just nuts and crazymaking for everybody. "That post about her German teacher was really about your girlfriend!" Seriously. :) I just think it's silly. If you convince yourself this stupid thread is a major player in the great interweb conspiracy, you first have to convince yourself the entire world is made up of people who have no lives outside one tiny internet board, and they all have the mentality of the worst kind of teenage girl.

It's just - it's a *venting post*. Isn't venting supposed to be all about ranting where the target can't hear you? When I'm saying things I want to say that I don't think the other person needs to hear (see above, I would never actually physically threaten ANYONE in real life!) it seems like it would mind-blowingly defeat the purpose to have the person be able to SEE it.

I don't get it as a weapon in teh interwebz wars, and I don't think anyone with a life would use it that way. And even saying that, I still get the "Hey, is that about me?" feeling.

And after all that babble, I mostly just wanted to say, "Go, you!" on opting for your own peace of mind even when people are pressuring you. But I am too long awake, which always and forever leads to unfocused babbling. *g*

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Well sadly, some of us *do* have to read this crap, as it's part of our jobs ;) (and I know for a fact that three of the posts in here are about me, I just don't care - I don't feel passively aggressively hurt or upset, I'm actually kind of amused that people feel the need to call me out publicly, but "anonymously" so they don't have to face an actual confrontation). Personally, I feel it's the people who post here rather than voicing their problems directly who are passive aggressive, but to each his/her own, right? It doesn't affect me outside this forum, and to be honest, it affects me very little within it ;)

If people want to talk about how this thread makes them feel, they have as much right to do so as you do to revel in using it to your heart's content. The whole "get a life" thing has always been a cop-out. People have opinions that differ from yours, so that means they don't have a life??? Pretty narrow viewpoint ;) Fortunately, I'm just as entitled to my opinions as you are to yours :bleh:

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...I'm actually kind of amused that people feel the need to call me out publicly, but "anonymously" so they don't have to face an actual confrontation.

Exactly. ;)

And unfortunately, some members truly have been on the receiving end of those "Dear Jerk" letters, and it's not just speculation on their part or thinking that the world revolves around them. It's just fact...and it's shitty fact, quite frankly.

Just my two cents. Not trying to start an argument, just yapping. ;)

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Lynne - Uhm? Looking for offense much? You never crossed my mind when I was posting. Wow, could you be more illustrative? Not only was this not about you, you were not even a shadow of a thought when I wrote this. I barely know anything about you, and that just in recent weeks. Why on earth would you think I was targeting you?

I didn't say anyone with an opinion different from mine was wrong. I said anyone who posted here as an anonymous passive-aggressive attack on someone probably needs a life. Didn't try to shut anyone up, didn't say people can't have opinions, just gave mine. Disagreement is not censorship.

Basically, you repeated my points back to me. Points for active listening?

I also love how one post is "reveling to your heart's content." Are we back to imaginary posts again?

And now you've made yourself into an example, but I'm still not talking about you. I have a whole life of people I've met in my head shaping these thoughts. Your post here is just a tiny sprinkle on the tip.

Injecting yourself into imaginary unexpressed thoughts - this is the POINT I was making. Somehow, some way, some people will always hear the worst - and more, the worst about them - in everything other people say. That base vain assumption that everyone knows everything about them, and more, cares. "If you insult criminals it's because you know I stold a candybar when I was five and YOU ARE OUT TO GET ME." Pfft.

And some people will make snide little posts and feed the paranoia. Wheee. "You must be emotionally under 15 and seriously stilted to ride this ride."

Nicole - Yeah, but knowing how petty that kind of attack is, how could a letter like that really bother anybody, even if they were "sure" it was about them? Yeah, pissed off, upset, whatever, but the whole "You are RUINING my LIFE with your Dear Jerk letters to your MOTHER!" is just batshit insane to me. And the people running around sending little letters "that was really about you" need a keyboard-ectomy. :drool:

And I'm not arguing either. I just think the drama level gets really seriously silly. I get why people see themselves. I get why people resent. I just don't get the level of OMG!1! about it, and guess what? I have as much right not to get it as these guys have to do it.

My opinion's really simple - if it hurts you, don't read it. There is a whole wide world outside this little board. Ninety-nine point nine percent of the people even here don't care anything about the handful of people waging the personality wars. They just want the crazy people to stop landing on them from outer space. Enjoy the forum, talk to people, have fun. Click "close" and get up from the keyboard and think about other things.

Like I'm doing now. Nini and adieu. :D

Edited by Kate Did What?

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Gee Kate, think a bit much of ourselves? I wasn't referring to your posts at all. I was referring to Dawnie's and TomOne's, which are, in fact, directed at me :)

Sorry to bruise your ego, but you weren't even a blip on my radar screen. I also wasn't targeting you with MY post, so why you thought I was is beyond me.

Pot? Kettle.

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Gee Kate, think a bit much of ourselves? I wasn't referring to your posts at all. I was referring to Dawnie's and TomOne's,

which are, in fact, directed at me :shifty:

Interesting that you're so certain of that. :)

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Hmmm...

Dear Donuts,

Why are you so tasty? I can't even look at you now. Stop it!

Love,

Susie

Okay, okay, you got me. That was really a note about Nicole being tasty. Damn it. I'm so ashamed! :)

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Hmmm...

Dear Donuts,

Why are you so tasty? I can't even look at you now. Stop it!

Love,

Susie

Okay, okay, you got me. That was really a note about Nicole being tasty. Damn it. I'm so ashamed! :)

:rolleyes:

That Nicole. She is irresistible isn't she?

*drools*

:hug:

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Hey! How'd I get pulled into this? :)

Though it's true...I AM very tasty. Susie and Vet, I'm glad you all are vouching for my tastiness. :hug:

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*nibbles on "donuts"* :)

:ninjalurking:

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Hey! How'd I get pulled into this? :)

By the sheer magnetism of your personality?

:hug:

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I love that answer. LOVE it. :)

By the way...you gals ain't too shabby yourselves. If I met any one of you in a dark alley...man...I'd like to describe that meeting, but it would be...hmmm...inappropriate.

(But it would involve pepper, tissues, and a cowboy hat.)

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Video, or it didn't happen. :)

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Are you volunteering to be cameraman??????

:)

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Ooooh, I hope so!!!

Because then he can jump in!

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