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CPG

Does anyone want to co-write a story with me?

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CPG   
CPG

I want to write a fetish story but I keep finding reasons not to, and I feel like if I were writing something with someone else I'd be more motivated. Anyone interested? Female sneezing is preferred but other than that I'll write pretty much anything. 

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ThePokeFan599   
ThePokeFan599

I have a draft of a female sneezing story that I wrote about a month ago and have not yet touched since. It's based on SmokeyGhost story, A Cold Halloween. Interested? 

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CPG   
CPG

Sure that sounds great!! Do you have a tumblr? I don't have pm access here yet so we could discuss logistics there. Mine is chickwiththepurpleguitar

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

I was also going to say I was interested, but it looks like I've missed the boat. Keep me in mind if this falls through or you need a third person, though.

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CPG   
CPG

I will always write two things at a time @Kiaory!! Did you have anything in mind?

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

I have a few ideas tucked away for future stores if you want to hear them. I don't need them to be the basis of this particular story though, if you had something you wanted to do. Are there any elements you want to include? What kind of sneezefics do you usually like reading?

(Also, I've never collaborated before. Do we take turns writing a page at a time or something?)

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CPG   
CPG

I think it depends on what kind of story we're writing. Do you have a tumblr? It'd be easier to plan if we could communicate off this site somewhere

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

I'm afraid I don't, sorry. :( 

I've got a Skype, but I'm not sure how to get in touch without one of us having to put their account name up for everyone to see (assuming you even have a Skype). Maybe I could put my email or something up and edit it away as soon as you read it?

For what it's worth, this mode of communication works for me. I don;t know what problems it causes you though.

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CPG   
CPG

No, it's okay, we can just keep talking here! What ideas did you have already? I don't like particularly big or messy sneezes but other than that I don't have a whole lot of preferences.

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

Well, it might take em a while to remember what I thought of and then put off for later but here're the ones I can remember off the top of my head. A lot of them are very odd, though, and a lot are science fiction or magic realism. I'll understand if you want to do something more down to earth.

  1. You know how people used to think diseases were caused by sprits? The main character discovers that she (and no-one else) can see the anthropomorphic personification of her cold. Drama comes from the fact that the cold, only a few days old, will die when she gets better.
  2. A skeptical photographer/journalist and a computer technician try to teach an AI design to create instant computer generated images to realistically depict somebody sneezing. Possibly by demonstrating themselves.
  3. A girl with a strong mental block and and bad allergies desperately (and largely unsuccessfully) searches for somewhere private where her subconscious will let her sneeze. Possibly in a school environment. 
  4. two time travelers need to either cause or prevent someone from sneezing at a certain time and place in order to change history.
  5. In a hypothetical future/fantasy (whichever) society, any reflexive or autonomic physical action are taboo. People wear special devices/magic thingies that give them perfect and total control over their bodies. Our hero almost sneezes while her's is briefly removed to be refitted, and despite herself becomes obsessed with curiosity about how an actual sneeze would have felt. But in a society where simply knowing what a sneeze is is shameful, how can she figure out how to cause one without bringing suspicion on herself?
  6. A gameshow about going inside propelled noses and making them sneeze/trying not to make them sneeze. (I've had the first chunk of this one lying around for ages.)

Any of those sound interesting? I can try to remember more.

Edited by Kiaory

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CPG   
CPG

Ooh all of these look super cool! Can we try either 2, 4, or 5? You pick which one.

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

I'd probably go for 4 or 5. The thing is, I've got a fair amount planned out for 5 already, whereas 4 is really just a vague notion. On the plus side, that means we've already got a good foundation for 5 already, but on the other hand it means you might not get quite as large a role in shaping the plot if we did that? Like, I'm willing to change and ad stuff, but there's some stuff I'd want to keep as well.

If you're ok with that I guess 5, or 4 if you're not. :) 

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CPG   
CPG

I'm totally fine with a shaped plot, so let's go with 5!

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

Ok, great! sorry for taking so long to respond. I wrote a bit of the first scene for this one back when I first started writing sneezfic. I'd like to re-write it now that I hopefully have some idea what I'm doing, but it should give you a decent idea of where we start.

First time.rtf

Beyond that, here's what I was thinking of for the plot so far:

  1. this is the scene in the snippet. Our protagonist takes off her reflex inhibiting thingy to refit it. During the process, she starts feeling like she needs to sneeze, something she's never felt before. She panics, but manages to finish up and out the thingy back on just before she actually sneezes.
  2. She does her best to out the incident out of her mind, but she cant help wondering how it would have felt to actually sneeze. She may or may not actually know what a sneeze is at this point. She definitely has no idea what causes them.
  3. Despite her better judgment, she decides to try to satisfy her curiosity. One day when she's all alone in the house, she takes the reflex inhibitor off for the afternoon. Unfortunately, her nose doesn't even tickle because there's nothing to make her sneeze.
  4. Eventually she works up the courage to look up something a scandalous as sneezing, and learns that they are caused by something irritating the inside of the nose. (I was thinking she might use a library computer for this, to prevent it being tried back to her)
  5. She spends a couple of days deliberately walking near flowers and could if dust, while neglecting to blow her nose. In this universe, blowing one's nose is a daily hygiene task, like brushing one's teeth.
  6. At night, after everyone else has gone to bed, she stand sin from of a mirror and takes the reflex suppressor off, causing her nose to tickle ugly from all the built up irritants.
  7. As she starts building up, her mother knocks on the door, wondering why her light was on in the middle of the night. Our protagonist has to convince her mother that her hitches are really just a breathing exercise for singing that she's trying out, while trying not to sneeze. Eventually her there leaves without noticing the missing reflex thingy.
  8. As soon as  her mother leaves, she puts her reflex thing back on and blows her nose the next morning, scared away from attempting it again.
  9. That's about as far as I planned, really. She should get to sneeze in the end though. 

(Also, if we're feeling fancy I think we could try and spin this whole things as a puberty/coming of age metaphor. Just a thought.)

That's what Ive got so far. What would you like too change or add? 

Edited by Kiaory

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CPG   
CPG

That all sounds awesome!! Unfortunately the attachment didn't work for some reason, so maybe you could just copy and paste the scene you already have? Other than that maybe in this universe, everyone has allergies which was one of the reasons why the reflex things were invented in the first place, and that's how our protagonist knows what will make her sneeze once she's trying to.

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

Here's the copied scene:

 

    Sandra fingered the edge of her reflex suppressant collar nervously. Normally she barely noticed the slim metal necklace, but  lately the implacable actions of puberty had been making it uncomfortably tight. Unfortunately, as her parents had kindly informed her, she was old enough now that enlarging it really ought to be her job. It wasn’t as if she had never had it off before, but on the few occasions where a new link had needed to be added, her parents had always done it while she slept, blissfuly unaware that her body was shamefully released from her control. 

 

    Sandra stared at herself in the bathroom mirror, nervously running over a mental checklist. Shivering? It wasn’t particularly cold in here, which meant she was probably safe from goosebumps as well. Yawning? She had gotten a good nights sleep . There wasn’t much she could do to prevent hiccups, but as far as she could recall, they were rare anyway. Sandra racked her brains for anything she was missing. What caused sneezing again? She couldn’t remember. Still, a sneeze was supposed to be a big, messy expulsion of air, so so it ought to be pretty difficult to trigger, right? Maybe she ought to go look it up anyway, just to be safe…    …no. She had spent the last fifteen minutes just standing there trying to work up the courage to start, and if she kept procrastinating she’d probably be here all day. Before she could think better of it, she reached up to the fastener at her neck and tore the collar off. 

 

    Her first impression was that she felt… pretty much the same. Contrary to her fears, her body wasn’t doing anything on its own yet. Feeling slightly silly, though no less nervous, Sandra set to work unscrewing the last link from the fastener.

 

 

    After a few moments, Sandra became aware of an odd sensation in her right nostril. It was an odd sort of itchy tingling, like something gently brushing against sensitive skin. She was about to flare her nostrils to dislodge whatever was causing it when, to her shock, they flared by themselves. She felt a quiet burst of shame but, she rationalized, her body had a mind of its own right now. She couldn’t help it. 

 

    As she worked, the sensation spread backwards, deeper into her nose. She tried to ignore it. She had attached the links at one end, now she just needed to put the whole thing back together… As Sandra reached for a screw driver, the sensation building in her nose leaped down her throat into her chest, forcing it to expand. Panicked, Sandra tried to exhale evenly, but her lungs refused to listen. The regular cycle of her breathing began to degrade into uneven gasps. She tried to reattach the fastener, but her eyes began to shut of their own accord. 

 

hehhh…    hhhaaaa     hhhhhaaaa

 

    Something had to give. Her gasping grew more intense, sucking in air through her suddenly open mouth until she felt she was about to explode. Her head tilted back, pointing her flared nostrils strait forward. She was about to…

 

hhhaaahhhhh…     aaaaaahhhhHHH-

 

*click*

 

    As the now completed collar snapped closed around Sandra’s neck the tickling sensation faded. She slowly let out the air that had accumulated in her lungs, slowing her heartbeat back down as she did so. That had been… close. She was sure of that. Whatever that sensation was, it had included a terrible sense of anticipation. She was certain that if she had finished the re-fitting even a second slower she would have… sneezed maybe? She had always thought sneezing would be sudden. An unexpected and humiliating explosion of air and mucus. Not that she had ever really though about it. Reflexes just weren’t some a normal person thought about. But if she had, she wouldn’t have expected it to feel like… that. Gasping for air, bloating with it until she felt like she couldn’t do anything but explode. Troubled, Sandra began tidying up and endeavored to put the incident out of her mind.

 

 

I would like to re-write it though

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

As for the idea of everyone having allergies: I have few objections, although they're not insurmountable.

First, the story is about  her trying to figure out how to make her sneeze. If she knows from the beginning, I feel like that might make it to easy? It's possible I've misunderstood your proposal.

Second, my intention for the society was that any involuntary action, not just sneezing, would be considered shameful and disgusting. As a result, the protagonist is embarrassed and ashamed of her endeavors, at least to start with. Allergies could be the original reason for this but....

Lastly, the reflex suppression collars were meant to put EVERYTHING under the person's control, not just sneezing and hiccuping and yawning. Someone wearing one has to remember to keep their heart beating, to move food along their guts, and consciously controls stuff like the fight-or-flight response as well. It might be a better idea to chance that, though. 

Your thoughts? 

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CPG   
CPG

Oh ok, I think I misunderstood you too. Never mind then, that's totally fine. Anything else you think we need to plan before we get started? (I'm kind of trying to stall actual writing TBH cause I have two days of school left).

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

There are a few things we should figure out first, yeah. Don't worry about delaying, I'm in pretty much the same boat. My last final isn't until Friday.

some things we should probably figure out:

How are we actually co-writing this? We could take turns posting text here like an RP, but that means we can't edit each other's stuff. Maybe a google drive document? Or a file passes back and forth by email?

We should decide on the protagonist's name, looks, personality, and age.

how does she finally get to sneeze?

is it ok if we change it so the protag doesn't even know the word sneeze until she does her reaserch? I'd like to change that. I'd also like to make the collars a little less powerful so they don't control adrenaline or peristalsis. 

Is the setting exactly like the real world except for the collars? Or should we make it more fantasy or scifi?

And,generally, is there anything else you can think to add? I'd love to have scenes, plot points, or moments that were your idea. I just had a bit of a problem with the one idea.

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

Hello? Are you still there? :worriedsmiley:

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CPG   
CPG

Yes! Hi! I am so sorry! I was on vacation all this week and unexpectedly had no wifi. I'm home now but things are starting to get really busy again, so I actually don't think I'm gonna have time to write much anytime soon. I'm so sorry for getting your hopes up and starting to plan all this, but I just really don't think I'll have the time or the motivation to write anything. Please feel free to write this story on your own if the inspiration comes to you, and if I ever find myself with ample writing time I'll let you know. Sorry again!

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Kiaory   
Kiaory

Eh, it's alright. Not your fault if real life intervened. Besides, I've got several of my own projects on the horizon, so it's not a huge loss. Best of luck with whatever's keeping you busy. :) 

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